Sorry I had to use Joseline’s song, her being extremely out there with her sexuality, but it proves my point! In this generation there are more shotgun weddings, pre-marital babies, teen pregnancies, and STDs than perhaps ever before. Kids are having sex earlier and earlier and we should not be using forms of birth control for 12-year-olds. And I’m not just talking to the ladies, men too. We have got to stop this double standard that we have allowing our men to be loose but then cracking down on the ladies. When are we going to realize that it goes both ways and that there is not one more significant than the other. It starts with the parenting, but once we as young adults are released into the world, it is up to us from there.
As far as parenting, parents have to set the example. If a daughter sees her mother walking around in provocative clothing and being promiscuous and immature, she will emulate what she sees. If her father only dates woman who appears as though everyone has ran through her, they will think this is what men are attracted too. Sometimes situations consciously affect children once they become of age. For instance, if one of the parents cheats, divorces, constantly says ill things towards one another, is not present, walked out of their life, teaches them incorrectly, or simply doesn’t discipline, it shows in adulthood. This generation is spoiled with parents using the excuse that the child should have more than they do; that is the goal. But if the parent has everything, where does that leave the child? Do we see that eventually if we repeat the “I want my child to have what I never did” eventually the child will have everything? Everything to the point of being so spoiled that there’s nothing the child can’t have.They grow up without respect, morals, values, and good attitudes because mommy and daddy told them they could have the world. Parent have to talk to their kids about sex and be open. Do research and find ways to make it easier. It really sticks with us later. We also can’t over protect them because this causes rebellion so there is a balance. Allow them to make mistakes and learn from them. Let them fly and be there to guide them. Punish them appropriately when they are wrong. And yes, some children need to be spanked. Train a child in the way they should go. Set an example and don’t be an example of what no to do. The child needs to be raised with spiritual foundation whether that be church or whatever it is you believe in in order to reinforce right and wrong. These upcoming generations need guidance. Children can’t raise children and grandparents shouldn’t raise children for lazy parents. It’s a responsibility and we all suffer the consequences.
Now, once the parenting is done and we go out on our own, the rest is up to us. I’ve seen people who were raised in wonderful families with a great upbringing that still end up making stupid mistakes. Curiosity and peer pressure can make a good apple turn into a bad egg. For the beautiful ladies with a good family; everything that glitters is not gold. We cannot allow ourselves to be fooled by the persuasion of a man who wants nothing more from you but something he can get from any other girl. The rule that works for me is: if you can’t see yourself having a baby with him, don’t get in the bed. Just keep the consequences in mind before making a bad decision. Don’t hang out alone in the room with men, don’t give it up to any man with a pretty face and sweet talk, and don’t set yourself up for failure. A man will show you exactly who he is if you pay attention. Just because men do whorish things during this age doesn’t mean we have too and not all men do it. Don’t profile them miss out on good men. Get a title and fall in love before you consider you body. If a man will cheat to be with you he will do the same to you. There are so many ways to avoid the system. And for those who didn’t have the best upbringing, stop using that as an excuse. A parent that’s not present is not your crutch. You can change it! You can be better that that! You can look back and show off on how far you’ve come and make those you love and yourself proud. Also, gold digging is so dead. There’s always a price for money and even if you find a man who will buy you everything you could ever want, he will lack in so many other areas that it will leave a hole in your heart. You deal with the public, the criticism, and the child you realize that is going to be just like him. Men; it is not expected of you to be hoes so stop the foolery. You have the power to make the life you wish for and you choose to lay down with dogs? These girls will run you dry. Just think about sex as dropping a penny into a little bucket every time you do it. Once that bucket’s full, then what? Then you wanna marry? You’re blown out by that time and sex isn’t going to be special like it’s supposed to be. Let your crew make stupid decisions and suffer those consequences alone. Or better, stop hanging with discouraging friends. Having a record will not help you in your future and no man is complete without having success. You want girls and consequences or a fulfillng life and foundation? You choose.
This is not a post to bash sex. Even biblically sex is described as a gift from God. I only remind my readers to be in love with who you give your body too. Screw a 90 day rule. It’s when YOU are ready and there is no time limit on that. Whether it’s 6 months or until you’re married. There’s no addiction; it’s all in your head that you need it and can’t stop once you start. Many people regret who they give their first time to anyways. It’s OK to wait. It’s beautiful to wait. Be the unique one. Attract someone as unique as you and make magic. Share a moment with someone special who has proved your love and who you feel totally comfortable with; someone you can introduce to Mama and someone you’ll have longevity with. I refuse to go along with the 2015 trend of sex being normal and since everyone is doing it that means I’m weird if I decide not to sleep with whoever I want. It’s supposed to be about being in love and connecting and chemistry. Sex was created to end in the beauty of a child so keep that in mind. Make sure you’re getting checked, using proper birth control, and making smart and conscious decisions and no birth control is 100% effective.The child should enter world with two parents that love them and create the masculine a feminine balance in their life however this is done. Be stingy with your cootie-cat and men gate the snake.