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Moving On After Being Cheated On

Infidelity is one of the most damaging problems that relationships face. It hurts all parties involved and it can lead to a dark road of depression, confusion, and anger. While some are able to push past this and salvage their relationship, others take another road and opt out. However, when all is said and done, the pain still remains. How exactly does one overcome this and move on with their life?

1.) Cry.

Go ahead. Let it all out. Play all of the sad songs you can think of, trash your room, and if you have a trusted friend that you can call, contact them and start venting. You’ll feel so much better. Don’t let this stage last for more than three days. And above all else, do NOT let your ex see you while you’re down.

2.) Disconnect from your cheating ex COMPLETELY.

No matter how hard it seems, you have to avoid making contact with your ex. That means no speaking, seeing, “check-up” calls, texting, and especially sex. No, you can not be his/her friend at this time. Get rid of all gifts from your ex. You don’t have to throw them away, but you can put them in a garage, storage, or at a friend’s house until you are over your ex. Once you start avoiding your ex, there is no turning back. And thus, the healing process begins.

*If you make just the slightest bit of contact, you will be back at square one.

3.) Get back to the basics.

This means returning to the things you used to do before you got into this relationship. Start catching up with friends you may have drifted from while with your boyfriend/girlfriend, go shopping, host an all day Xbox tournament-whatever is was that you liked doing. The things that once made you happy will start to bring you happiness again.

4.) Occupy your time.

Whatever you do, DON’T stay at home all day doing absolutely nothing. In this case, isolation is dangerous. When people are left alone, their thoughts start to wander. The next thing you know, your ex will come to mind. Get out of the house, go for a walk, or visit your neighbors.

5.) Flirt!

Go on dates for crying out loud. Not for the purpose of finding a new relationship, but just for fun. Enjoy your time out, and if the subject of your ex comes up, brush it off as if it’s nothing. Don’t say “I don’t wanna talk about it” because some people are nosy and will keep pressing the issue. Instead, keep it short, sweet, and to the point: “It just didn’t work out.”
6.) Forgive your ex.

Easier said than done, but this is necessary to continue on with your life stress-free. Let go of the anger, hurt, and pain, and stop thinking about getting revenge. You can hold on to the situation if you want to, but don’t be surprised if your blood pressure goes up and you end up in the hospital.


Author: Raena

Originally published August 12, 2012

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